Today my 5 year old tossed an orange juice cup my way and it turns out the cup was half full.
The juice covered me in a shower.
We all laughed and we laughed hard.
When did I turn this corner? The corner of not stressing over cleaning up another mess and instead having eyes to see the humor of it all?
The beauty of the last 3 weeks is filtering into every area of my life. We have good food to eat. My home is not perfect, nor is it perfectly clean, but it is sparkling one area at a time. My kitchen floor has been sticky for two days, but it is waiting. It is waiting because I've been working on some other things. Productive things.
I'm not spending valuable time on the telephone or computer when I need to be working with my children and around my home. There is a direction to our days and I see it. I see it. There is purpose. I was wandering aimlessly in a land of chaos. God is setting my feet on new courses.
Saying no to myself. No I won't run to Bath and Body Works today because my Wall-flowers are empty. It will wait until Thursday, and then I will evaluate if that still needs to be a priority.
Saying yes to change. Tonight for example, my husband has asked me to work on taxes. I thought really long and hard about going out to eat and spending time browsing the rows of Hobby Lobby instead. The thought of a cold, dark Wednesday night spent in the warmth of a restaurant where I was not the chef nor was I the dish washer. That was a nice thought. Wednesday night is when that sounds the best. Followed by Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday after church. Oh yes, I'd eat out all the time if we could. But what about finding a little contentment in the mundane.
What about going home, whipping up some grilled cheese sandwiches made with Sharp Cheddar and going in the office when we're done with our simple dinner. What about turning on the lamps, lighting a candle, turning on Kari Jobe, inviting my boys to come in to talk with me while I work? That is the road that leads to fulfillment.
As I sit here my heart is full. It is full because I made the choice.
The choice to deny myself.
The choice to honor a request my husband asked of me.
The choice to tackle a little paper work even when that is literally the very last thing I'd naturally enjoy doing.
The choice to create beauty in the moment.