That's how I've lived anyway.
I mean, I want to need God, but my actions have spoken another truth. The ugly truth is that I've become independent from Him. Put myself into positions where I meet my own needs. If there is a need, I meet it. Being self-sufficient has become the normal way.
I've been thinking about us as Americans and our lives being defined as the land of the free and the home of the brave.
I think we could also call it the "Land Of The ME, Home Of The Slave".
People want to come here for opportunity but is it?
Looking around, even at my own life, is it all about Me? Making myself and my family comfortable? Setting up our little kingdom so we'll be set? And is fear chaining us down so we're slaves to it? I can't give extravagently, then I'd be out of control. I can't go to a new place with God because then I'd be out of control. Hmmm, I'm not sure if I want to relinquish the reigns of my life.
After reading Katie's book and seeing a glimpse into a Third World Country, I'm seeing the black and white difference between what it looks like to need God and what it looks like to meet my own needs.
He showed me I had been drinking the watered down cup, but living independently from Him, that was a blow to the ol' spiritual ego. Katie came back to America for a few months and here is what she said:
"The biggest shock to my system, the huge disconnect, is that I have stepped out of my reliance on God to meet my needs. I "miss" Jesus. He hasn't disappeared, of course, but I feel so far from Him because my life is actually functioning without Him."
I get that. It makes sense. We can love Jesus. Go to church. Volunteer. Go to Bible study. Be nice. Give an offering. Say prayers with our kids. Teach them right vs. wrong. And we can do it all in our own strength, if we're not careful.
So, I read a verse in I Cor. yesterday. It said the kingdom of God is not a matter of talk, but of POWER.
I love quizzes, always have. You want to take a quiz to see how you're doing? Look at today or back up and think about yesterday. Did you see God's power? Did you need Him?
Do you need Him?
If you want to live a life of power this side of heaven you do. If you want to see God's glory shine from your one life you do.
That is why the cross is so powerful. Jesus gives life to the dead things in your life and mine. We're always only one conversation with God away from being in His Presence and headed toward His will.